The rain fell hard and fast, a solid curtain which the car sliced through. Driving at night was difficult enough already, requiring concentration and attention that was not needed in the daylight. The weather made it worse.
Bright lights everywhere pierced the gloom. Headlights and tail lights of the other vehicles, traffic lights and street lights, lighted store signs: their brightness shone through the rain and reflected off the raindrops, making it all but impossible to see the slick road in the dark.
The rain pounded on the roof of the car, a sound which faded into the background of attention but was impossible to ignore. The radio could have drowned it out if it were turned up loud, but that would distract from the effort of driving in its own way.
The tires slipped, and the car lurched to the side briefly, but luckily the next lane over was empty. The next traffic light up ahead changed from green to yellow and then to red more quickly than it should have. The car cruised through the red light before there was a chance to apply the brakes.
The man behind the wheel took a deep breath and sighed quietly, but he didn’t take his eyes off the road.
#1 by me. on January 24th, 2010
| Quote
Very descriptive. You definitely get a clear sense of the environment and the character’s actions — and you want to know what happens next.
nice job.
#2 by CJ on February 5th, 2010
| Quote
Argh.. leaving comments here is tricky.. If I've left 3, please feel free to delete.
Anyhow, excellent description – been on that road, been through that stoplight – you bring it to mind very vividly.
#3 by Dana on February 9th, 2010
| Quote
Very descriptive. You set the scene well.